evil

All posts tagged evil

Now, I’ve only one other topic I’ve written about on this subject, here, and so I’m not getting into my personal beliefs on “evil” and I will now stop putting it quotation marks.

I will only offer this very general opinion: evil is the absence of conscience.

It is also the inability to empathize with others.

And a lack of compassion perhaps.

This entry is not really about what it is—this is about what causes it and why so many (especially non-religious) people have such a difficult time trying to understand why someone could do something so utterly horrible to another person—or to an animal.

What I *guess* causes it is hyper-left-brainedness. I know the right-brain houses the inherent “ethics” of mammals like us, and the left-brain in humans creates an artificial reflection of this biological mechanism; we know this as “morality.” Conscience and morality are two different things.

What about sociopaths and psychopaths? With them, it is not just they lack a function of their to know what is good to do and what is bad to do; no, it’s more than this: they enjoy being “bad.” They get off being fucking evil. Why?

How would a person enjoy inflicting pain and suffering on another life form?

This is the part that has confused me in the past—this is the part that confuses a lot of people, in fact.

I’m not talking about sadism, sado-masochism, sociopathy, psychopathy, or any other psychological term. Is evil just a mental illness? I don’t know. I’m going to proceed as though it is not.

So, the question is…how does a good human being become evil? I mean, most people are basically good folks. They care about their family, they care about their children, and their friends. They try to help where they can. They see a person bleeding and screaming and they feel—they empathize with them—and their biology via their right-brains lets them know that this is wrong and they should do something to stop this terrible thing.

One might argue that children don’t seem to have this (conscience), and to a degree it’s true—their brains and minds are not fully developed. It’s there, but like any other mental function of an infant, it’s unformed.

Ever watch a toddler with a puppy? Yeah, that little kid could kill that thing and not comprehend what just happened. That little kid could jam spikes into the puppy’s ear canals, claw out its eyes, and jump on its back…giggling all the way while this poor creature yelps and suffers and bleeds and dies…

When I was six years old my sister was mad at me (she was a year older) and threw a fork at me—it hit me, points forward, in my forehead. I was so mad I walked outside to my dad’s shed, grabbed an ice cream pail full of nails, marched back into the house, down the hall, into the living room, and whipped this five-pound bucket of nails at my sister’s face. She ducked and it smashed through the large front window.

She hurt me and I wanted revenge; I was enraged and wanted to hurt her—bad.

When I was the same age I used to take a magnifying glass, catch insects (mainly ants), and pin them down; with the magnifying glass I would focus the sun on the abdomen of the creature until it exploded, literally boiling the bugs’ fluids.

Why? Why did I do this?

I was an angry kid, and I took out my anger in many ways—and this as one. It never occurred to me that this was a life form that had the same right to exist as I did.

But I did not see it that way. I was a pissed off six-year-old.

Not many people have empathy for insects—it is because the less an organism looks like us, the less able we are to feel anything for it. The more it seems like an object. The easier it is to just smash it.

What makes it easier is the robotic automaton nature of insects—given the chance, they would kill you; they would eat you; they would lay eggs in your eye sockets or your brain, have their young eat you alive, drive you crazy. They steal your blood, steal your skin, and give you diseases in the process.

Well, fuck, why not kill them?

The thing is, they are not evil. They are beyond that concept; they have no capacity for good or evil—they just survive and carry on. It’s nothing personal; they don’t enjoy it or laugh about it, or boast to their insect buddies later. It’s just business.

So, when I’m out in the wild, this is what I do: I leave insects alone, generally, until they land on me. Spiders I give a wider birth and am not quick to kill them when they crawl or fall on me. I brush them away (spiders eat harmful insects—flies, mosquitoes, et al). They have a get-out-of-jail-free card. But anything else (except hoverflies, which just feed on plant liquids and nectar, and sometimes will land on you because you resemble a flower or might have sugary stuff left on your fingers, or whatever), I will flick off or just kill. It depends what I think it is and what kind of threat it is to me.

This approach is a combination between a conscience and a set of morals, I think.

So, how can a human being have this mentality towards other humans?

Well, I think it’s not an easy, cut and dry situation. You can train people (see: National Socialists, Germany) to “hate” another group of people; governments have been doing this since Sumer, and probably way before that. Demonization. What does that mean? To make into a demon; well, what is a demon? It is not human and it is harmful to humans. It’s an enemy that is nothing like us. It must be fought and destroyed.

I guess it’s not that hard to make otherwise good people to do unspeakably evil things to other people. The rulers of empires and kingdoms have become masters at this, thousands of years before Rome.

Maybe 99% of human history (since agriculture) has been about the people being used and abused by its rulers, its kings and queens, its emperors and dictators, its oligarchs and control-freaks and intellectual social engineers and self-appointed experts of what’s good for you. The overwhelming majority of human experience on this planet has been tyranny.

Not freedom.

The last few hundred years here in the West have been a dream, a delusion, a brief blip on the radar that didn’t come back to bleep a second time. So, probably 99.99% of our leaders, whether elected or unelected, in the entire expanse of human history, have been either sociopaths or psychopaths. If you like these psyche terms. I prefer the term “just plain fucking evil.”

But what I really mean by that is that they’re consistantly doing evil things (and we are what we do, repeatedly).

The overwhelming common experience of being human, like you and me, has been stuff like this…

And this…

(Warning: the video directly above is the full version and is extremely graphic; I’ll bet you every coin I have on me that you will not be able to watch the entire thing. I dare you to try.)

And this:

And this:

And this:

And this:

(Another warning: very graphic and disturbing.)

These are not isolated rare cases. People (not criminals) are being beaten, tasered, shot, or tortured (and, in many cases, to death) by a force of armed citizens who were put in their positions to “protect and serve” the public. This shit is going on all over North America every single day. I could literally sit here for hours, days, and plaster thousands of videos here as evidence, but I won’t. You’re not a fucking fool; you know this happens.

The issue is whether you believe these people deserve what happened to them.

If you felt bad, sick, or angry, that’s good; it means you’re still human.

Me, when I searched to find another video I recalled, I came across a few on the police getting beaten up; in most cases, they had it coming, in my opinion. But the point is, I enjoyed these.

And I caught myself smiling, and I stopped, and thought, Well, that’s it, isn’t it?

I was cheering for the abused, and I enjoyed watching the abuser get what was coming to him (even though these cases were unrelated—it was not the same person: just the same uniform). I loved watching a citizen stand up and clock a police officer in the face. I felt a rush, a flood, of adrenaline and I was grinning.

And that’s how easily evil can take place.

The bad guy’s getting whooped.

So, the question becomes who is the bad guy? Who decides and how is this decided? In the mind, I mean. Unconsciously, or subconsciously, because this just happened five minutes ago and I do not remember any conscious decision.

The uniform. One form. Of course that makes it easier to lump them all together. Like insects.

Anyway, I just wanted to get that out: during an attempt to write about the nature of evil, I watched police beating to death a couple of innocent people, and then I watched citizens defending themselves against different police and I was glad those cops were getting what was coming to them; which is evil, because I don’t think it’s right for me to enjoy the suffering of another human being under any circumstances.

Interesting, I must say.

[And that’s all I can say right now. I’m drained and have a headache from just this little bit I’ve written, and I haven’t even gotten into half of what I wanted to bring up here. This was not supposed to be all about police, but… Need to get away from this for a bit.

Update. 11:30AM.

Well, I got up over an hour ago and checked the usual alternative media sites, and there it was: the two cops charged with the murder/manslaughter of Kelly Thomas (the 2nd and 3rd videos from the top) have been acquitted. And now I’m going to change directions here.

Update. 15/01/14.

To be continued…]

I hear a lot of things. I see a lot of things. And sometimes I say a lot of things.

I’ve heard and seen things like:

People suck.
People are stupid.
Humanity is a disease.

And these are some of the more pleasant comments about human beings that I’ve heard.

Things I’ve said…well, they were worse. A lot worse.

Recently, it’s occurred to me that more and more people are saying shit like I used to say, but not many seem to understand any degree of distinction, context, or else they’re just agreeing to something they’ve heard and are repeating it.

Before I begin the subject itself, I’d like to be clear, because those who do not really know me might just assume what I’m going to write here. Let me explain…

I used to be a nihilist, and an atheist, and I was probably a misanthrope as well as being an unprofessed feminist, back in my late teens, early twenties.

But, really, a nihilist actually precludes almost everything—a hostile, negative, destructive attitude towards everything, everyone, and myself.

In truth, I was full of rage and pain nearly every day, unfocused. I didn’t comprehend why at the time, and so I took it out on everything and everyone—except most women, who I used to think were a little bit better somehow—but mostly I took it out on myself.

Why me?

For becoming what I allowed myself to become. In my teens I wanted to live in the wilderness, be a “mountain man,” or, ideally, live like a Native American. That was the only dream I’d had since age 13 or so, and when I was forced to give up on it by age 19, what followed was living a life I never wanted, never respected, was ill-prepared for, and found cheap, artificial and shallow, empty, absurd, insane, meaningless and disgusting. In other words, a normal civilized existence as a “happy worker”—school, job, fun, distraction, family, marriage, kids, retirement, depression and alienation and addiction, grinning like a monkey as you march from one cage to another, one box to another, until you reach your eternal box, the coffin.

Not necessarily in that order.

It was never the life for me, but here I was…stuck in it, or it was stuck in me. I dunno. Maybe both.

I’ll spare you the horrific details of the years that came next, but suffice to say that I deteriorated and did my best to self-destruct, as a “nihilist.” (I never fully broke out of the sick, dark sack of venom called nihilism until, on, or nearing the time I began this blog, as evidenced if you’ve ever read a few of the old entries of 2005-2006.)

For as long as I can remember, I have viewed ancient/primitive humans as the best example of human beings, and I have viewed modern/civilized humans as flawed, broken, defective, ill, immature, and overall the worst examples of humanity.

I think the truth is somewhere in the middle, though I know it’s leaning towards the primal human.

And I know I’ve written a lot about how fucking awful “we” are, how horrible, murderous, vile, manipulative, destructive, yadda yadda. One thing, however, that I’ve always countered with is this:

I was talking about modern or civilized humans. I have never believed that ALL humans are shit. I have never believed that every human on this planet should be eradicated. I know, I know—you could probably find a blog entry somewhere in which I mentioned that the planet would be better off if we were all dead.

Seriously, though, every time it was with the perpetual notion of mine that the tribes such as in the Amazon, and the Inuit, and the purely hunter-gatherer tribes in Africa and elsewhere, were spared from this slaughter.

So, I do not clump all peoples into one ball and say, “It’s shit.”

I see the differences. And that is the context and distinction I mentioned earlier.

Okay, now that I’ve made myself clear, we can begin…

And what of evil?

I never believed in evil. I’d always thought that there was no such thing—that it was a construct created by the religious to spread fear and control the masses. My guide has always been the natural world—if it doesn’t apply to human animals and non-human animals equally, it’s nearly always horse pucks.

But I’ve come to see that it does exist—maybe not in relation to any Scripture or Faith, though. I think it simply reflects the absolute worst state.

After reading so much Nietzsche, I was convinced that it did not exist because nature and life itself are beyond morality—“life is amoral.”

The thing is…I did not realize that morality and conscience are different. Conscience is inherent in organisms; morals are taught, are learned, are reasoned and rationalized—into existence or out of existence.

Without getting into more right-brained/left-brained stuff, there is the sense of right and wrong that develops within you and is collectively shared by all (sane individuals) of your type (in varying degrees), and there is the right and wrong that we’re taught as children. Sometimes they coincide, and here’s where we possess a solid structure of “ethics,” I figure.

But all of this is arguable, and it is not necessary for me to get into fully; I offer it only as a starting point into the subject of evil.

One given used to be, with which most people seemed to agree, was that children, babies, should be protected. It was such a no-brainer; every other mammal does this—protects its offspring.

It used to be a measuring stick for evil—that harming a child, that causing pain to or even killing innocence—someone defenseless, vulnerable, trusting, and most in need of protection—was a damned evil act.

But that has passed. It is not a given any longer.

Check out an update on the issue of “Post-Birth Abortion.”

Now, we must be a person to have a right to exist. Corporations have legally obtained status as a “person,” while our newborn babies are going to lose this and be fair game for murder.

Evil.

It’s a loose term—I do not picture fire-breathing winged monsters in never-never-land when I think of the word “evil.” I envision someone giggling at the suffering of another; I imagine causing another pain for no reason except for the satisfaction or sick delight of it.

I see a person being held in a cage against that person’s will.

I picture senseless murder and torture, and needless suffering. Needless. Like smashing someone’s kneecaps in with a baseball bat and watching them writhe and scream before you shoot the person in the face.

It might be logical—a gangster might do this to send a message to a rival gang—or it might be irrational—but it’s all evil.

No creature in Father Nature would be so cruel. That says something: we are capable of things that the most vicious predators in the wild, which have spawned tales of the most terrible, most frightening monsters in history, would never do.

There is cruelty in Nature, don’t get me wrong. But almost all of it is for a point: to strengthen an individual, family, or species. What isn’t takes place incidentally: a boulder rolls down a cliff and crushes the legs of a critter, which is forced to lay there in fucking horrible agony until it dies of shock or slowly starves to death.

As bad as that is, it falls under the category of “shit happens.” Yes, it’s awful, but what can be done? It’s no one’s fault. There was no will, no intent, no intelligent design that decided to roll that big rock towards the animal and see it crushed, broken, in unbelievable pain and suffering, waiting only for prolonged death.

Evil is about actions. It is about intent. It’s a choice.

If you shame a child and make it feel terrible about something, for no other reason than you are pissed off or bitter and are taking out your bullshit on a defenseless person who can’t fight back and who you can control…I’d say that was an evil thing to do.

I would not call that person evil.

There is a difference. Objects are not bad. Cells and tissue are not evil. Blood and veins and teeth and bones are not evil. Grey matter inside a skull is not evil.

What’s evil is the choice, the intent, and the action.

So, are humans evil?

Absolutely not.

What many do is definitely, totally, staggeringly fucking evil, but they themselves are not bad. We are not evil. For every choice we make to do evil, we also have the choice to do good. Even if we do evil, we can seek out our conscience and choose to make up for it, by deeds—by consistent, ongoing deeds—of good. To right a wrong—not to gain praise or acceptance, not to score points with some real or imagined Authority—but only for its own sake.

That is “goodness.” Being unselfish and humble and actively making up for nasty fucking shit you did to others. All and only because it’s the right fucking thing to do. No other reason. This is one of the things I admire about humans. All humans.

People do not suck. It’s only what we do that sucks.

People are not stupid. I resist the entire notion of intelligence, or the lack of it. There is no such thing as intelligence, I say—as we commonly (and smugly think we) understand it today. We are as as smart as we need to be. Every creature is exactly as smart as it needs to be; there is no such thing as “stupid.”

It comes down to abilities, traits, sure, but mostly it’s about about how much we use our brains—I’m not talking the “percentage” of the brain power we do or not use; that’s bullshit too. We use all of our physical brains—the point is the degree with which we use it.

Take a diver. This diver has a massive lung capacity. Most people cannot hold their breath as long as this fellow. This guy can stay under for way longer than the average person.

And why would it be to praise this person and shame others who do not his lung capacity? How crucial is this ability to general human life—how much of his day is spent underwater? Are his lungs smarter than everyone else’s? Are they a genius?

Of course not. He was born with the exact same pair of lungs as everyone else, and everyone has lungs that work, to some extent.

The difference is that he practiced and during this he worked on his ancient mammalian diving reflex—acclimatizing his body and lungs to be able to stay under longer.

Same thing with brains. Sort of. The brain is divided into two halves, of course, and most of us work out one more than the other. There are so many areas of each half of the brain that do something different that it’s virtually impossible to let it all go to pot. And some parts of the brain need little “exercise” to stay “fit.” Usually, also, when you work out a part of your brain too much, you neglect another part.

Anyway, I’m over-simplifying of course. The point is: someone might be lazy, someone might be retarded, but no one is stupid.

Yeah but what about all humans being stupid?

How can anyone say “humans are stupid” with a straight face? I’ve heard it said that we just need to get smarter and everything will be okay, that we have “so much potential.” I never fell for this slop. We are what we are—humans are no different than our ancestors were 25-30,000 years ago. We have not “evolved.”

That’s just another pathological ego trip.

We’ve become specialized in certain areas, but overall we use a hell of a lot more of our left-brains now and a helluva lot less of our right-brains.

We’ve merely traded some things for other things—we’re no “smarter” than the erroneously portrayed “cave man.” We’re better at some things, and worse at others.

But we place far too much importance upon intelligence—why? All “intelligence” is…is the ability to use certain areas of the left hemisphere of the brain and how and where it’s applied. We don’t consider intuition or instinct “intelligent;” we do not consider creativity, imagination, or the ability to improvise “intelligent;” yet do we consider the following things: humour, integrity, honesty, generosity, compassion, empathy, and living wisely.

Some of us may value these traits, but I’ve never heard them spoken in the lofty air beside the Royal “Intelligence.”

All we consider “intelligent” is what benefits and helps us exist within civilization—the ability to read and write and grasp concepts others tell us are important; and if you invent things which apparently make things easier for people, you get branded the biggest praise-trip prize: Genius.

Don’t you think there’s a reason for this? A reason that only the sort of “intelligence” that’s worth anything and won’t get you shamed, mocked, and ridiculed, is one a State sanctioned education can provide? What does this tell you?

For most people, the longer they remain in an educational system, the less wise, the less intuitive, the less creative, the less innovative they become; the more their minds are formatted; the more dogmatic and narrowminded and formulaic they are; the more rigid and snobbish and arrogant they become; the more dismissive and judgmental, as well.

And I think most of this comes from education—not the lack of it.

People say TV makes you “dumb,” or the internet makes you “dumb.” But I think what’s “dumb” is just laziness (apathy) and ignorance. It was school that fucking trained you to sit and mindlessly absorb whatever was presented to you. School made you a fucking couch potato. School bored you so bad with tedious, irrelevant bullshit that now you “don’t give a shit”—read: are lazy, apathetic, pig-headed. School shamed and ridiculed you. School was the place you were taught to compete for grades (praise from Authority), taught to respect Authority, and where you learned how to dress to fit in. School was where chicken-hawks got their talons into you and made you a submissive, spineless, shamed, scheming, neurotic money-grubbing minion of some corporation. Don’t believe me? Well, just go stand in line and sing the National fucking Anthem, but spit out that bubblegum first, or else you’ll be in trouble!

School made you dumb, idiot!

What the fuck else could a passive, bureaucratic, passionless and non-experiential learning process bring about? A free-thinking, creative public whose life doesn’t consist of work and entertainment and escape? A strong, healthy, active public consisting of dynamic people who question everything an authority tells them?

Heh.

School, like work, is quite simply a crime against fucking Nature.

I cringe when I hear folks tell young people, “Stay in school.”

Ugh. No, for fuck sakes. Drop out of school and become an individual; learn what you need to live, not what you need to become a corporate serf—aka. “have a career;” learn on your own, seek the truth for yourself, rather than passively, submissively letting mediocre prats shoot garbage into your mouth and order you to swallow it down.

Fuck. Don’t stay in school.

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Think about it. (If you do not have a lot of education, you’ll be better able to think about it.)

What does education really do? What is it really? It’s obedience-training. You learn to follow rules (while you learn how to read the rules) and you learn, subconsciously, that you are an inferior. Your teacher becomes your boss in the next phase of your servitude, once you leave school. (But, in all actuality, you never really leave school. Your involuntary systematic obedience training (school) just shifts into obedience reinforcement (work), through which you get paid to be humiliated, exploited, and belittled as a life form.)

Most insipid is that you learn (on a memetic level) what is reality. What should you think about, how should you think, and what the truth is. You’re essentially trained to register lies and bullshit as the truth and what makes sense. It is because nearly everything you’re taught is the diametric opposite of the truth. And it’s hard to change seeing things any other way. Your brain just gets wired a certain way, and mentally you become resistant to memes that were not part of your original programming.

Your mind is being formatted for servitude. Your “human nature” is produced. And you’re taught only that which will help you do what you’re told later on, and for the rest of your material, kowtowing, ego-driven life.

A self-made person is someone who actively seeks information, and the truth, from every source he can. Education is about passively sitting and letting the State plant seeds inside your fertile, trusting mind.

If you’re lucky, you’ll drop out and learn on your own. But most end up worse praise-junkies than they were as children—grade-grubbers.

These types of people are ready to follow orders, not to think independently, not to question much at all.

It is only an exceptional individual who comes out of college with any spark of true brilliance. Any hint of real genius at all.

Anyway, there really is no such thing as intelligence. There are only levels of smug satisfaction, degrees of obedience, and varieties of willing ignorance.

Therefore, I figure this was arranged this way. It just makes better drones.

Before agriculture, before civilization, before education, before human sacrifice and slavery, there were far fewer evil acts committed. Research it if you don’t believe me. I dare you.

Finally, humans are not a disease. We—as modern humans—have (not so) simply become the by-product of a viral system: agriculture. That doesn’t make us a disease. Ancient humans lived in harmony with their environment.

Only agricultural (civilized/modern) humans employed highly organized gathering, the systematic manipulation, control and subduing of the earth. Once we started farming, it became a disease and spread everywhere, as we ran out of resources from being sedentary and over-populating, devouring everything within the walled city’s radius, spreading out, demonizing the natives we found, and taking their shit, all enforced by armies of killers and thieves funded by those greedy cunts (the aristocracy) who trained those killers and thieves.

And I suppose this formula has never really ended…

Those were evil acts; it does not make us evil. Even the aforementioned greedy cunts are not evil; they merely do evil things on a consistent basis.

Conclusion?

Well, recently it dawned on me that it seems we’re being made to view all humans (except perhaps the super rich; royalty; the aristocracy; the ruling elite oligarchy, if you prefer) as absolute scum.

If you believe that those who seem in charge of the world right now, controlling us, are actually being controlled by a more elite group, who control the banks, for example; and if you believe that this elite group is a very nasty cabal which is definitely not a bunch of nice folks who really love us and want what’s best for us—that they in fact rule as an oligarchy and have for a long, long time and have an agenda for the utter enslavement of most humans; if you believe that they encouraged human population growth so as to create a vast pool of consumers and taxpayers which enabled them to purchase the world and everyone in it; if you believe that making money was not the end but merely a means, and that now they only want absolute control, the final phase of their age old plan; and if you believe that absolute control can only take place through a systematic and multifaceted mass-murder campaign, to reduce the current level of population to a much more manageable level…

If you believe all that, then you share some beliefs with me.

(If you don’t believe much of that, go look up Eugenics, Thomas Robert Malthus, Henry Kissinger, the Club of Rome, UN Agenda 21, and the origins of Planned Parenthood, just for starters. Watch the following documentaries: “Blue Gold;” “The World According To Monsanto;” “Gasland;” and “The Greater Good.”

Then come back here and blithely dismiss all of this.

If you still can’t pry your skull from your anus, check this out:

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“One CFR published policy objective is substantial worldwide depopulation including half of the current U.S. population being targeted. This population reduction program is largely funded by the Rockefeller Foundation and the Merck Fund, both financially and administratively linked to the Merck pharmaceutical company–the world’s leading vaccine manufacturer. Records show the Merck pharmaceutical company received a major share of the Nazi “flight capital” at the close of World War II when its president, George W. Merck, was America’s biological weapons industry director. These facts were revealed by Norman Covert, Army public relations director at Fort Detrick in Frederick, MD, and veteran news correspondent Paul Manning in his book “Martin Bormann: Nazi in Exile” (Lyle Stuart, Inc, 1981).” — Dr. Leonard Horowitz

“Indeed, it has been concluded that compulsory population-control laws, even including laws requiring compulsory abortion, could be sustained under the existing Constitution if the population crisis became sufficiently severe to endanger the society.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“One way to carry out this disapproval might be to insist that all illegitimate babies be put up for adoption—especially those born to minors, who generally are not capable of caring properly for a child alone. If a single mother really wished to keep her baby, she might be obliged to go through adoption proceedings and demonstrate her ability to support and care for it. Adoption proceedings probably should remain more difficult for single people than for married couples, in recognition of the relative difficulty of raising children alone. It would even be possible to require pregnant single women to marry or have abortions, perhaps as an alternative to placement for adoption, depending on the society.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“Adding a sterilant to drinking water or staple foods is a suggestion that seems to horrify people more than most proposals for involuntary fertility control.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“A program of sterilizing women after their second or third child, despite the relatively greater difficulty of the operation than vasectomy, might be easier to implement than trying to sterilize men.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“The development of a long-term sterilizing capsule that could be implanted under the skin and removed when pregnancy is desired opens additional possibilities for coercive fertility control. The capsule could be implanted at puberty and might be removable, with official permission, for a limited number of births.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“In today’s world, however, the number of children in a family is a matter of profound public concern. The law regulates other highly personal matters. For example, no one may lawfully have more than one spouse at a time. Why should the law not be able to prevent a person from having more than two children?” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“Perhaps those agencies, combined with UNEP and the United Nations population agencies, might eventually be developed into a Planetary Regime—sort of an international superagency for population, resources, and environment. Such a comprehensive Planetary Regime could control the development, administration, conservation, and distribution of all natural resources, renewable or nonrenewable, at least insofar as international implications exist. Thus the Regime could have the power to control pollution not only in the atmosphere and oceans, but also in such freshwater bodies as rivers and lakes that cross international boundaries or that discharge into the oceans. The Regime might also be a logical central agency for regulating all international trade, perhaps including assistance from DCs to LDCs, and including all food on the international market.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“The Planetary Regime might be given responsibility for determining the optimum population for the world and for each region and for arbitrating various countries’ shares within their regional limits. Control of population size might remain the responsibility of each government, but the Regime would have some power to enforce the agreed limits.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“To date, there has been no serious attempt in Western countries to use laws to control excessive population growth, although there exists ample authority under which population growth could be regulated.” — John P. Holdren, Obama’s science advisor, Ecoscience 1977.

“The resultant ideal sustainable population is hence more than 500 million but less than one billion.” — Club of Rome, Goals for Mankind

“In order to stabilize world population, we must eliminate 350,000 people per day. It is a horrible thing to say, but it is just as bad not to say it.” — Jacques Cousteau, 1991 explorer and UNESCO courier

“I believe that human overpopulation is the fundamental problem on Earth Today” [and] “We humans have become a disease, the Humanpox.” — Dave Foreman, Sierra Club, co founder of Earth First

“We don’t want the word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population.” — Margaret Sanger

“MAINTAIN HUMANITY UNDER 500,000,000 IN PERPETUAL BALANCE WITH NATURE” — Anonymously commissioned Georgia Guidestones

“Society has no business to permit degenerates to reproduce their kind” — Theodore Roosevelt

“If I were reincarnated I would wish to be returned to earth as a killer virus to lower human population levels.” — Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, leader of the World Wildlife Fund

“A total population of 250-300 million people, a 95% decline from present levels, would be ideal” — Ted Turner, founder of CNN

“And advanced forms of biological warfare that can “target” specific genotypes may transform biological warfare from the realm of terror to a politically useful tool.” — The Project for a New American Century, Rebuilding America’s Defenses, p. 60, Dick Cheney and Paul Wolfowitz

“Whatever the price of the Chinese Revolution, it has obviously succeeded not only in producing more efficient and dedicated administration, but also in fostering high morale and community of purpose. The social experiment in China under Chairman Mao’s leadership is one of the most important and successful in human history.” — David Rockefeller Banker, Honorary director of Council on Foreign Relations, honorary chairman of Bilderberg Group & founder of Trilateral Commission. Member of Bohemian Club, praising Chairman Mao, whose policies killed at least 30 million people

“Every one of you who gets to survive has to bury nine.” — Eric Pianka

“[Disease] will control the scourge of humanity,” — Eric Pianka

“I do not pretend that birth control is the only way in which population can be kept from increasing. There are others, which, one must suppose, opponents of birth control would prefer. War, as I remarked a moment ago, has hitherto been disappointing in this respect, but perhaps bacteriological war may prove more effective. If a Black Death could be spread throughout the world once in every generation survivors could procreate freely without making the world too full. There would be nothing in this to offend the consciences of the devout or to restrain the ambitions of nationalists. The state of affairs might be somewhat unpleasant, but what of that? Really high-minded people are indifferent to happiness, especially other people’s.” — Bertrand Russell (1872-1970), Philosopher

“The most merciful thing that a family does to one of its infant members is to kill it.” — Margaret Sanger

“Eugenic sterilization is an urgent need … We must prevent multiplication of this bad stock.” — Margaret Sanger

“Eugenics is… the most adequate and thorough avenue to the solution of racial, political and social problems.” — Margaret Sanger

“The big threat to the planet is people: there are too many” — Sir James Lovelock

“My three main goals would be to reduce human population to about 100 million worldwide, destroy the industrial infrastructure and see wilderness, with it’s full complement of species, returning throughout the world.” — Dave Foreman, US environmentalist and co-founder of the environmental movement Earth First

“The extinction of the human species may not only be inevitable but a good thing.” — Christopher Manes, Earth First

“Childbearing should be a punishable crime against society, unless the parents hold a government license. All potential parents should be required to use contraceptive chemicals, the government issuing antidotes to citizens chosen for childbearing.” — David Brower, first Executive Director of the Sierra Club

“I wish very much that the wrong people could be prevented entirely from breeding” — Theodore Roosevelt

“The Puerto Ricans are the dirtiest, laziest, most dangerous and theivish race of men ever inhabiting this sphere… I have done my best to further the process of extermination by killing off eight and transplanting cancer into several more.” — Dr Cornelius Rhoads (1898-1959) | Rockefeller Institute, Rhoads also headed two large chemical warfare projects, had a seat on the AEC (Atomic Energy Commission), and he headed the Sloan-Kettering Institute for Cancer Research

“I have studied with great interest,” he told a fellow Nazi, “the laws of several American states concerning prevention of reproduction by people whose progeny would, in all probability, be of no value or be injurious to the racial stock.” — Adolf Hitler

“While we were pussyfooting around…the Germans were calling a spade a spade.” — Whitney, executive secretary of the American Eugenics Society, declared of Nazism

(referring to sterilizations) “The Germans are beating us at our own game.” — Joseph DeJarnette, superintendent of Virginia’s Western State Hospital, 1934

“From an historical point of view, the first method which presents itself is execution . . . Its value in keeping up the standard of the race should not be underestimated.” “Applied Eugenics” also devoted a chapter to “Lethal Selection,” which operated “through the destruction of the individual by some adverse feature of the environment, such as excessive cold, or bacteria, or by bodily deficiency.” — In 1918, Dr. Paul Popenoe, the Army venereal disease specialist during World War I, co-wrote the widely used textbook, “Applied Eugenics”

“Instead of recommending cleanliness to the poor, we should encourage contrary habits. In our towns we should make the streets narrower, crowd more people into the houses, and court the return of the plague.” — Thomas Malthus

“Englishmen Francis Galton to describe the “science” of bettering human stock and the elimination of unwanted characteristics… and individuals. Galton proposed societal intervention for the furtherance of “racial quality,” maintaining that “Jews are specialized for a parasitical existence upon other nations” and that “except by sterilization I cannot yet see any way of checking the produce of the unfit who are allowed their liberty and are below the reach of moral control.” — Francis Galton

“The Aids epidemic, rather than being a scourge, is a welcome development in the inevitable reduction of human population… If it didn’t exist, radical environmentalists would have to invent [it].” — Dave Foreman, the founder of the environmental group Earth First

Francis Crick, who together with James Watson is credited with the groundbreaking discovery of the double-helix structure of DNA, declared at a conference shortly after receiving the Nobel Prize that the “reproductive autonomy” of human beings could not be tolerated in the future. Among other things, Crick suggested the idea of adding a chemical to public water supplies, that would make men and women sterile; only those who qualified for a “license” to produce children, would be given an antidote drug.

“We have to take away from humans in the long run their reproductive autonomy as the only way to guarantee the advancement of mankind.” — Francis Crick

Alexander Graham Bell advocated passing laws (with success in some states) for compulsory sterilization of people deemed to be, as Bell called them, a “defective variety of the human race.”

“If the youth is content to abandon his previous associates and to throw in his lot whole-heartedly with the rulers, he may, after suitable tests, be promoted, but if he shows any regrettable solidarity with his previous associates, the rulers will reluctantly conclude that there is nothing to be done with him except to send him to the lethal chamber before his ill-disciplined intelligence has had time to spread revolt. This will be a painful duty to the rulers, but I think they will not shrink from performing it.” — Bertrand Russell, “The Scientific Outlook”, 1931

“The first task is population control at home. How do we go about it? Many of my colleagues feel that some sort of compulsory birth regulation would be necessary to achieve such control. One plan often mentioned involves the addition of temporary sterilants to water supplies or staple food. Doses of the antidote would be carefully rationed by the government to produce the desired population size.” — Paul Ehrlich, The Population Bomb

AIDS and other diseases will be the COVER STORY for the decimation. The real causes will be starvation, contaminated water (which has existed for a long time), toxic vaccines given to people who are already immune-suppressed, wars, and of course, stolen farmland. [2003] Depopulation and HIV by Jon Rappoport

Investigations by EIR have uncovered a planning apparatus operating outside the control of the White House whose sole purpose is to reduce the world’s population by 2 billion people through war, famine, disease and any other means necessary. [1981] The Haig-Kissinger depopulation policy by Lonnie Wolfe

Rockefeller also told Russo that his family’s foundation had created and bankrolled the women’s liberation movement in order to destroy the family and that population reduction was a fundamental aim of the global elite. Rockefeller Admitted Elite Goal Of Microchipped Population

Or just go back to watching TV. It’s all good as far as I’m concerned.)

I think it’s true, or that at least there’s a lot of truth to it. And I think I was one of the suckers who unwittingly put forth a part of their plan—“culling the herd.”

I think humanity was engineered to appear as awful as possible, and I think we have been incrementally acclimatized to the notion that we’re utter shit and should be wiped out.

But those at the top who have been arranging this will not be among the dead; they will rule over the survivors. Do you think all the people in those quotes above will be among the first to kill themselves “for the betterment of the planet?” If so, you’re in for a surprise.

None of what they say applies to them.

Apparently, the plan is to have about 500 million humans on the planet. But the “elites” will survive and emerge later to rule to dumbstruck crowds of zombies.

Well, it’s not so simple for me; even though I believe I know what’s coming next, I cannot fight another belief I have: there really are too many people on the planet.

I do not, however, agree with or support what’s coming. We need a predator, a disease, something…something natural to keep human population in check, like every other species does. Not a sketchy, deceptively disguised, secretive and organized methodical genocide.

That, to me, would be evil.

In the wild, an animal kills for food, to rid itself (and its gene pool) of a rival so it can breed, or for self-defense. It is not evil. It is part of the balance of nature.

Anyway, I guess it’s all moot. I think it’s going to happen and nothing anyone can do will alter the slide over the cliff.

Again, this goes back to something that will become helpful in one way, although the intent was purely evil.

Why evil?

Say, you have a farm. And you’re a cunt. All you want is a good series of crops to sell come the last harvest. That’s it. Twenty years and then you’re done. Then you’ll have enough to retire to the good life.

So, you buy some slave labour to do the work. And you sit back and let them all do the work, maybe coordinating shit with your foreman, your task-master, who keeps the slaves in line.

Now, the last summer is ending, but your slaves have multiplied fast—you have seven times the slaves you had to begin with; you have way too many slaves and everyone else has too many slaves so you’ll never be able to sell them—so you plan out with your foreman to burn down the slaves’ quarters after they finish harvesting your crops.

And so it went well: big success! The night after you sell the whole works for a fortune, you get your foreman to lock the barns and fire them, killing everyone inside them.

You used people, kept them against their will, abused them, and gave them nothing but hardship and pain, all for your own selfish, piggish desires. And then you fucking murdered them horribly.

Most would call you a bad guy, some would call you an evil cunt, but I’d just say you did some grossly evil things.

I’d also say that maybe you’re helping the overall overpopulation of slaves; there will be more resources for the rest of them perhaps. Or perhaps you’ll take most of it and starve another pile of slaves, resulting in another favorable depopulation. Point is, whatever good might come out of something terrible…well, the intent was evil and so you get no credit for it.

I think we’re being made to accept what’s coming—maybe I’m too far gone and have already accepted one part of it.

But the more I look, the more I see it: a growing evil that manipulates its increasing justification and rationalization.

And the more I see what’s coming, the more I’m torn between wanting it to happen and not wanting it to happen. Maybe there’s some evil in me, too. I don’t know.

Give me back my broken night
my mirrored room, my secret life
it’s lonely here,
there’s no one left to torture
Give me absolute control
over every living soul
And lie beside me, baby,
that’s an order!
Give me crack and anal sex
Take the only tree that’s left
and stuff it up the hole
in your culture
Give me back the Berlin wall
give me Stalin and St Paul
I’ve seen the future, brother:
it is murder.

Things are going to slide, slide in all directions
Won’t be nothing
Nothing you can measure anymore
The blizzard, the blizzard of the world
has crossed the threshold
and it has overturned
the order of the soul
When they said REPENT REPENT
I wonder what they meant

You don’t know me from the wind
you never will, you never did
I’m the little Jew
who wrote the Bible
I’ve seen the nations rise and fall
I’ve heard their stories, heard them all
but love’s the only engine of survival
Your servant here, he has been told
to say it clear, to say it cold:
It’s over, it ain’t going
any further
And now the wheels of heaven stop
you feel the devil’s riding crop
Get ready for the future:
it is murder

Things are going to slide, slide in all directions
Won’t be nothing
Nothing you can measure anymore
The blizzard, the blizzard of the world
has crossed the threshold
and it has overturned
the order of the soul
When they said REPENT REPENT
I wonder what they meant

There’ll be the breaking of the ancient
western code
Your private life will suddenly explode
There’ll be phantoms
There’ll be fires on the road
and the white man dancing
You’ll see a woman
hanging upside down
her features covered by her fallen gown
and all the lousy little poets
coming round
tryin’ to sound like Charlie Manson
and the white man dancin’

Give me back the Berlin wall
Give me Stalin and St Paul
Give me Christ
or give me Hiroshima
Destroy another fetus now
We don’t like children anyhow
I’ve seen the future, baby:
it is murder

Things are going to slide, slide in all directions
Won’t be nothing
Nothing you can measure anymore
The blizzard, the blizzard of the world
has crossed the threshold
and it has overturned
the order of the soul
When they said REPENT REPENT
I wonder what they meant

When they said REPENT REPENT …
“The Future”—Leonard Cohen

Nihilium: “Now what?”

Gornok: “Huh?”

Nihilium: “What’s your problem?”

Gornok: “No problem. Why?”

Nihilium: “Just looking at the title, thinking you’re about to rant about something…so obviously something’s wrong.”

Gornok: “Nope. Doing well. Satisfied, content, fulfilled, for now. Just been thinking.”

Nihilium: “About…?”

Gornok: “Life.”

Nihilium: “No kidding? What about life?”

Gornok: “Why? That’s what about life.”

Nihilium: “Awww…you depressed or something, pal?”

Gornok: “No. I just said everything’s great. I just don’t understand life.”

Nihilium: “What’s to understand. Life is life.”

Gornok: “Maybe, but why?”

Nihilium: “Why what?”

Gornok: “Why does life exist?”

Nihilium: “Sounds like your questioning life because you’re really questioning your life…”

Gornok: “Why is that when people question something, other people have to search for ulterior motives or attack the person on some psychological grounds?”

Nihilium: “I dunno. So, get to your point…”

Gornok: “I’m not questioning being alive compared to being dead, I’m questioning being organic matter compared to being inorganic matter!”

Nihilium: “Come again?”

Gornok: “Why be a tree or a mouse when you can be a cloud, or a mountain?”

Nihilium: “Ugh, I’m not sure. It’s just the way it is.”

Gornok: “That’s no answer.”

Nihilium: “Well. What do you want me to say? I never thought about this shit before. Life is life, non-life is non-life.”

Gornok: “Life just seems to be a useless dumb mess. Think about it. Life is a sloppy, stinking, slimy, goopy, sticky, disgusting mess. A greasy, noisy, smelly, cold, chunky, mushy, invasive fucking mess. A futile, screaming, scraping, clawing, slithering, shambling, lumbering, bloody, oozing, horrifically painful mess without any meaningful point whatsoever.”

Nihilium: “Enduring and getting stronger is the object—”

Gornok: “To what end? Just to die?”

Nihilium: “Okay…well, I still don’t get it.”

Gornok: “Every day is an absurd ritual of stuffing crap in one hole, squeezing out crap through another. What’s the point?”

Nihilium: “The point of Life is to eat itself, fuck itself, in order to give birth to itself. It’s all designed to make more Life.”

Gornok: “That’s my point. Why? Why make more? Why go through all this trouble, this revolting and detestable effort? Why not make less? Why not…don’t make any at all?”

Nihilium: “But then life would go extinct!”

Gornok: “So? Why would that be so terrible? No more creatures have to tear each other apart, risk their own lives finding a mate and fighting for the right to breed, suffer through falling meteors and earthquakes and drought and disease and hurricanes and bitterly cold winters…all to generate little versions of themselves who will repeat the process. It’s boring, monotonous, and—I think—fucking insane. The only point of life it seems is to be a pig and strive to replicate yourself. That’s it. No other reason.”

Nihilium: “What about evolution?”

Gornok: “What about it? All that means is adapting to an environment so you can be a better pig and make even more of yourself. Gosh, what a high ideal life has…”

Nihilium: “So, you think a mountain or a puddle of water has a better ideal?”

Gornok: “No. Inanimate stuff has no ideals at all. Maybe that’s better…”

Nihilium: “You’re crazy!”

Gornok: “I don’t think so. Crazy is a limited existence in which your level of success is determined by how much stuff you can shove into your face and turn into feces, to keep going and find another of your kind with a hole so you can stick your rod in it repeatedly until you squirt goo into the hole, which eventually creates a small version of you, which grows up stuffing junk into its face and turning it into feces, so it can keep going, find another of its kind, and so on, to create more of itself and perpetuate this senseless pattern. That’s fucking crazy.”

Nihilium: “Hmm. Since you put it that way, it does seem sort of silly, overall. But that’s not all that life is about; it’s about improving your species through your offspring.”

Gornok: “Improving them how? So they can be better pigs? So they can excrete more, pick more boogers, fart stinkier farts, piss stronger streams of urine, drool more saliva, take bigger shits, spew larger piles of vomit, bleed more blood, kill greater numbers of other life forms and shove them all into a toothy hole to be ground up and broken down with better acid? Just to do this all over again the next day? The next month, year, century? All so these better pigs can fuck more holes and create more little piglets and expand to more areas of the planet? What exactly does ‘better’ mean anyway? Seems to me it means ‘more piggish’ and that’s all.”

Nihilium: “Well…I don’t know what to say. Life is full of wonder and joy and other things you’re not talking about…”

Gornok: “Like what? Love? Oh, right. Slavery to another of your species and periodic bursts of chemically-induced ‘pleasure’ in your brain? Wonder—the moment of ignorance being shattered by chemicals in your grey matter. Joy—getting high off chemicals in your brain. What most of us think makes life worth living is in fact all about addiction and drugs—the drugs we produce inside our heads. These chemicals are produced biologically to keep us stoned and smiling, to reward us for doing the same things over and over, year after year, millennium after millennium. Why do you think sex feels good? Or eating? Or learning new things? We’re all druggies kept in a perpetual rut by biology, our built in drug dealer…Life…is nothing but a cruel junkie and a monstrous pig.”

Nihilium: “Wow. You are cynical.”

Gornok: “Don’t judge or dismiss me, just because you can’t allow yourself to think about this stuff. I thought you were a free-thinker…”

Nihilium: “I’m not. I’m a practical, rational thinker. A skeptic, and I had thought I was a cynic until I met you. But you got me beat. So you find nothing about life worth living?”

Gornok: “I do find life worth living, but only because I’m being manipulated and enslaved by Life itself, by nature, and by my own biology. Same as all of us—and by all of us, I mean every single living creature in the universe. I’m being fucked with and jerked around and made to do disgusting things every day. Every fucking day I need to generate energy, stop or prevent pain, take care of this part of me, wash that part, exercise the other part. And if I can’t generate enough energy to accomplish these mindless tasks, I degenerate, deteriorate, and suffer as a result.”

Nihilium: “It seems a little over-simplified.”

Gornok: “Perhaps, but that doesn’t make it incorrect. The next time you brush your teeth, think about how many hours, days, weeks, months, total, you’ve spent rubbing plastic inside your mouth…and tell me it makes perfect sense. And it’s all worth it. In twenty years, you’ll probably be dead…”

Nihilium: “Jesus. You’re dark…”

Gornok: “Dark, maybe, but honest. Maybe I’m light and not dark at all. Maybe God went insane from being alone for eternity—can you imagine the sheer terror of living forever in a nonstop, inescapable consciousness, neverending, watching the universe explode and contract and explode and contract and explode a zillion times, enduring perpetual boredom, suffering with the power to do anything amid the fact that everything means nothing, and there are no new things to do or know or see or hear or sense or taste or feel or create or destroy except the Totality of what has already been done a nonillion times, knowing All and screaming a deranged molten sorrow into the void of space because there is just no finality to this until the end of time, which does not exist?—entered into psychosis, and that’s what we are. What life is—a madman’s delusion. God’s nightmare. Right now God is gibbering and gnashing his teeth.”

Nihilium: “Hmmm. I don’t believe in God. Sorry.”

Gornok: “Speaking of teeth…most of this energy I generate I have to put towards finding other forms of organic matter and grinding it up with those teeth and make more energy out of it. What’s the point being a slave? No form of life has any manner of freedom whatsoever. It’s all an illusion.”

Nihilium: “Freedom compared to what?”

Gornok: “If I were a cloud, I could just drift about. No one and nothing pulling my strings, utterly free. Within chaos. Nothing to do but piss down rain or snow or hail, or simply blow away, with no consciousness, no will, no ego, no desires, nothing. But no—every day I see or hear a member of the opposite sex and my chain gets yanked again, whether I like it or not. I’m manipulated by biology to be attracted to a certain type of my own kind and be driven utterly mad by it. It takes over my thinking, controls my life, and starts a burning desire in me that only gets stronger and stronger until I am wholly consumed in every way…driving me insane until it’s released through sexual stimulation. And the next day I have to go through this again. Why do we put up with this fucking meaningless, empty, senseless daily horror?”

Nihilium: “I dunno. I guess, like you say, we’re addicted. What you would say: we’re addicted to ‘happiness’. What choice do we have anyway?”

Gornok: “That’s just it. Slaves always have next to no choices.”

Nihilium: “Oh dear. Well, it’s been a slice. A headache-inducing, depressing slice…”

Gornok: “Why are you depressed?”

Nihilium: “I’m not—this topic is fucking depressing.”

Gornok: “The truth is a real bitch, eh?”

Nihilium: “Truth of what?”

Gornok: “Of fucking life, you git! You’ve had enough of truth and want to go back to your delusions, inject some more chemicals and pretend everything is alright. But, you know something, my friend: you are going to die.”

Nihilium: “Oiy. Yes, I know that. What matters is the time we have left—”

Gornok: “Time. Pfft. Gimme a break, dude. Time is how we measure motion, the progression from one event to another. All of these events are futile, and pointless. Life itself is pointless!”

Nihilium: “Maybe if you were living your life, you would not be thinking about life. Eh? Huh? Ever have a thought like that worms its way through your brain?”

Gornok: “Everything lives its life. So what? I’m asking why. Or do you mean, what if I were pursuing my career, and plastering the internet with photos of myself, feeding my vanity and trying desperately to fit in, to belong, to be accepted, to be loved, to be a little kid again? Then I’d be a superficial self-absorbed twat like every other human, wouldn’t I? Aww, poor little guy. No, I’m cool! I’m so sweet! Am I not beautiful, and funny, and nice, and productive? Marry me, Betty, we can multiply, go forth and then fucking die. Where’s my flag! I wanna wave it around and hoot some!”

Nihilium: “Jesus, calm down, Gore.”

Gornok: “I will not. I asked you a question—why?”

Nihilium: “I don’t know!”

Gornok: “Yes, you do. Why are you alive?”

Nihilium: “Ugh, because I am? I had no choice in it, it just happened!”

Gornok: “Why?”

Nihilium: “Because my dad and mom fucked and out her hole I fell—”

Gornok: “Why?”

Nihilium: “Because their parents fucked, and on and on back—evidently—and back to the first two cells somewhere who got it on.”

Gornok: “Why did they get it on?”

Nihilium: “No idea! Random matter combined—”

Gornok: “No, that’s not it. Why? What was the point?”

Nihilium: “Does it matter?”

Gornok: “Matter is all that matters. I despise matter. I loathe it. If it was those two cells forming and fucking, then that has got to be the worst mistake in the history of time, in this universe and all others, in any dimension of realm of existence or non-existence. Christ, there is just no such thing as freedom….It’s merely species of slavery, on all levels, everywhere, in all things.”

Nihilium: “Then go be a flash of light!”

Gornok: “If only…but I’d still be a slave to forces, wouldn’t I? Physics, rules and laws that govern matter and energy. Still, at least I’d be out of this disgusting, revolting muck of life.”

Nihilium: “Yeah, the grass is greener on the other side of quantum reality, pal . . . Look, it is what it is. Accept what is or just kill yourself. Or go on driving yourself into deep dark holes of thought, and suffering without answers. I mean, I don’t have the answers you want, or seem to need—nobody does. We’re all…just…in this shit, here, now, and there is no fucking reason behind it all. Unless you believe—”

Gornok: “That some all-powerful being snapped its fingers and invented all this—all so we can learn and grow and obey, so we can suffer and die and follow orders and squeeze brown paste out of our asses and devour life forms alive, enslave them and cut their heads off and drink their blood and lay eggs in their faces, all to make more of ourselves, so we can suffer and die and suffer and die, until one day we get fucking judged for it all? By the very cunt who set it all up and cursed us for not being perfect enough slaves!? What the fuck! You’ve got to be fucking joking. And if we pass this barbaric, cruel, obscene, horrible test, we get to go to heaven and feel chemical rewards forever…is that about the size of this little scheme of twaddle? The smiling sensations of a Holy Drug Addict for ever and ever, amen?”

Nihilium: “Ummm. I guess. If you believe that. Frankly, neither point of view seems particularly meaningful, neither state is really appealing…I dunno, man. Can’t we change the subject…?”

Gornok: “Aye. Presently. Sort of… Well, sometimes I’d like to be some other form of matter—or maybe not matter at all. Can you envision existence as a lightning bolt?”

Nihilium: “No, not really. ‘Twould be a short life…”

Gornok: “All the lifespans of all life are so short anyway that everything might as well not live at all. What’s the difference? Who cares if everything dies tomorrow, or fifty trillion years from now? If a meteor comes and obliterates the entire globe, killing everything…what matter? What was it all for? It makes no difference at all, and it makes no sense whatsoever.”

Nihilium: “What if we’re meant to leave this planet and colonize—”

Gornok: “Yeah, yeah, ‘evolve’ and all that rubbish. You know, evolution is a crock of shit. Creationism is a crock of shit. So, okay, we leave the planet, and eventually our sun here blows up and destroys all the solar system. But we’re out there, hopping from planet to planet, solar system to solar system, on and on, exploding stars behind us. Then what?”

Nihilium: “We develop into—”

Gornok: “And after that?”

Nihilium: “We keep going.”

Gornok: “Until all the stars explode, and the black holes combine to swallow everything, and we all die. Again, what was it all for? What was the point?”

Nihilium: “Wait for the next Big Bang—”

Gornok: “So we can do it all over again? To what end? To whose benefit and what purpose in which function of what role of whose dementia are we doing this repetitive shit?”

Nihilium: “Jesus fucking Christ! So negative!”

Gornok: “Maybe…”

Nihilium: “Hey, maybe when we die we figure it all out?”

Gornok: “How? We’re dead! And you don’t believe that anyway…when we’re dead, we’re gone—you’ve said that before. And even if we aren’t, there is nothing to figure out! Knowledge of life would be wasted on the dead!”

Nihilium: “I suppose. So what then? I don’t know how else to look at all this…”

Gornok: “Well. Maybe we’re looking at it in our very tiny, narrow, detained life-form point of view. Maybe I am not complex—or simple—enough to really see what this is all about…but I doubt it. I’d still rather be energy. Lightning would be cool, now that I think of it. Maybe you come into existence every time there’s a storm. You’re immortal, intangible, but never alive at all. I think that would be cool. Its not death that bothers me, or even the needless, pointless suffering inbetween—it’s the inanity of life…eat, shit, breed, die, just to have your offspring be better at eating, shitting, breeding, dying, and on and on ad nauseum ad non compos mentis ad infinitum. It’s…fucking horror. Pure, indisputable pristine horror…”

Nihilium: “Evil?”

Gornok: “Indeed. Well…I just don’t see many people thinking about this sort of stuff…or discussing it.”

Nihilium: “There’s a reason for that.”

Gornok: “Yeah. Maybe.”

Nihilium: “Listen, man. Life itself might not have any purpose when you look at it the way you’re doing. All we have to do is figure out what has meaning for us; meaning—and purpose—for you. Just you. Meaning is invented by individuals, I think. Maybe it takes faith to do this. Belief in something that defies belief. Otherwise we all might as well grab an armful of rocks and jump head-first into the sea. It’s good to question shit, but when you get too deep into stuff like this, it can really drag you down and fuck you up.”

Gornok: “I guess. I’m too drained to think any more. So, that’s it then. I’m all finished here.”

Nihilium: “Okay. Chill, man. Think of something else—better still, just do something. Later, bro.”

Gornok: “Later.”